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Tuesday, 26 May 2015 12:19

Repent for Being Impious to Parents

Written by  Chan Shi Yih & Siow Lee Kien, KL & Selangor / Translated by Ong Mooi Lin

Liew Lee Ying marked her father’s death anniversary as her “Repentance Day”, but her years of repentance had been confined to sutra chanting, upholding vegetarianism and merits dedication to her late father. But these could not eradicate the bitterness in her. [Photograph by Teh Poh Tat]

Liew Lee Ying has marked the date of her father’s death anniversary as her “Repentance Day”. Her method of repentance all these years had been confined to sutra chanting, upholding vegetarianism and merits dedication to her late father. However, these efforts could not eradicate the bitterness that she had built within. “It is only normal for one to wish for longevity for one’s parents, so how could I blurt out a depraving remark like, ‘Is it a right decision saving dad?’”


 
Is it right to save dad?
 
Liew Lee Ying’s father was critically ill due to heart failure in 1998. All the siblings were at a lost, worrying about their father and the huge medical fees. A year earlier, their father suffered three strokes, one after another, and the medical expenses incurred had exhausted all their savings.
 
Lee Ying blurted out to her younger sister, Liew Lai Mooi, “Is it a right decision saving dad?” At that moment, she was thinking that if her father was gone, her mother would not be fighting with him anymore. Then, the family would be liberated and in harmony.
 
Since young, Lee Ying had witnessed how the conflicts in the family had sparked frequent quarrels between their parents regularly. They would yell or get physical over their conflicts. She was deeply depressed growing up in this kind of environment.
 
She revealed, “At ten years old, I saw my father grabbing my mother’s hair and hitting her head hard against the wall. Since then, I was weary of my father.” Adding salt to her wound, her father committed adultery due to lack of affection at home. This had negatively impacted Lee Ying’s young mind and she had determined that her father was an irresponsible man!
 
In recollecting the memory of her father, Lee Ying informed that when he had bad experiences, he would return home after work scolding her mother or other family members. Often, her mother had to escape from the home bringing together Lee Ying and her younger sister. Having witnessed all these events since young, Lee Ying slowly developed hatred towards her father.
 
Listen to Dharma and spread kindness
 
Every member of the family was extremely stressed when the father was home. At 14, Lee Ying courageously wrote a letter to her father, hoping that he would share his problems at work, as well as requested him to find positive solutions in communicating with family members. To her surprise, this letter brought changes to her father. His temper improved and there were fewer quarrels between her parents.
 
Lee Ying was able to communicate with her father after marriage, and found out about his helplessness in life. After suffering a few strokes, her father’s temper deteriorated. Due to personality clashes, he found himself isolated by his wife and he was lonely. He was suffering yet no one understood or empathized with him.  
 
“On November 13, 1998, the moment my dad passed away, I slapped my face non-stop as a reminder that I shouldn’t be so impious and unethical to my parents. Everyone wishes for longevity for one’s parents so how could I blurt out such a depraving remark as ‘Is it a right decision to save dad?’”
 
She has marked her father’s death anniversary as her “Repentance Day”. All these years, her method of repentance had been confined to sutra chanting, upholding vegetarianism, and merits dedication to her late father. Sadly, such acts of repentance could not eradicate the bitterness within her.
 
Through participating in the sutra adaptation performance this year, Lee Ying has gained a better understanding that repentance is not only limited to sutra chanting, but also to the public confession for the wrongs committed, as well as the honest admission of mistakes made. More importantly, all these wrongdoings must not be repeated.
 
Regrettably, her father could not hear her say, “I am sorry”. Nevertheless, Lee Ying has vowed to walk diligently on the Bodhisattva Path, to utilize the body given by her parents to do good deeds and transfer all the merits to her parents.
 
 
For her father’s sake, Lee Ying has vowed to take good care of her mother. She joined Tzu Chi in 1998, and has even inspired her husband, son, mother and siblings to follow suit.
 
After understanding her parents’ conflicts were due to Karmic Law of Cause and Effect, she learnt that only through grasping the Dharma can one be liberated from the vicious cycle, move away from the sinful path and avoid creating any sins again, thus leading a peaceful and harmonious life.
 
Lee Ying hopes that everyone would be able to eradicate all the bad causes in the past through the sutra adaptation performance in July, and stop creating bad karma thereafter.
 
 
After participating in the sutra adaptation performance this year, Liew Lee Ying finally understood that repentance is not only limited to sutra chanting but also to the public confession of the wrongdoings and honest admission of mistakes made. More importantly, to vow not to repeat the wrongs. [Photograph by Teh Poh Tat]   Liew Lee Ying brought her son (1st left) and husband (2nd left) to join in the sutra adaptation performance. [Photograph by Teh Poh Tat]

After participating in the sutra adaptation performance this year, Liew Lee Ying finally understood that repentance is not only limited to sutra chanting but also to the public confession of the wrongdoings and honest admission of mistakes made. More importantly, to vow not to repeat the wrongs. [Photograph by Teh Poh Tat]
 
Liew Lee Ying brought her son (1st left) and husband (2nd left) to join in the sutra adaptation performance. [Photograph by Teh Poh Tat]
 
Due to a misunderstanding about her late father (centre), Liew Lee Ying had been impious to him. [Photograph provided by Liew Lee Ying]   Liew Lee Ying vowed to make up for her past mistakes by taking good care of her mother. She joined Tzu Chi in 1998 and has been following Master Cheng Yen since then. [Photograph provided by Liew Lee Ying]

Due to a misunderstanding about her late father (centre), Liew Lee Ying had been impious to him. [Photograph provided by Liew Lee Ying]
 
Liew Lee Ying vowed to make up for her past mistakes by taking good care of her mother. She joined Tzu Chi in 1998 and has been following Master Cheng Yen since then. [Photograph provided by Liew Lee Ying]