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Monday, 11 July 2011 00:00

The Influence of Da Ai TV on Siow Lee Kien and Family

Written by  By Gan Chien Nee, Kuala Lumpur/ Translated by Lee Ren Hui & Hew Kwee Heong

Lee Kien thanks Da Ai TV and Master Cheng Yen's Jing-Si Aphorisms for giving her a harmonious family.【Photograph provided Siow Lee Kien】

Siow Lee Kien had never been on friendly terms with her in-laws; and in particular, her mother-in-law. However, after watching a Da Ai TV drama together, their relationship has improved.


After moving to a new house a few years ago, Lee Kien's husband, Tan Soon Hock, proposed to invite his mother to their house. As she had no reason to reject the goodwill of her husband, Lee Kien reluctantly agreed to his proposal, but with a "warning".

Siow Lee Kien told her husband, "Your mother can stay with us but I cannot guarantee that 'nothing' will happen!"

The days of a "frosty" relationship

In-laws' relationships are always difficult for many families. "How to get along with the mother-in-law" is always a tough issue to a daughter in-law. Lee Kien had been 'studying' this problem for the last 16-years. She thought she had fulfilled a daughter-in-law's duty as long as she provided food and shelter.

After her mother-in-law moved in, Lee Kien found that they had so many differences.

"It was stressful then! For example, my mother-in-law loves to watch Taiwanese dramas and variety shows hosted by Harlem Yu and Jacky Wu. And my children would watch together with their grandmother. They became very familiar with ‘5566' and other singers and celebrities, as well as, the popular songs."

Lee Kien also disliked her husband's other family members and would always criticise them in front of her husband. One day, her annoyed husband told her, "Stop criticising my family please!"

"Although I stopped criticising openly, I wasn't happy and this was clearly evident on my face."

"I always put on a long face because I was unhappy. I was also arrogant and self-centred."

Lee Kien recalled this regretful incident with repentance: "One morning, when I was preparing lunch in the kitchen, my mother-in-law walked in and ordered the maid to lock the door. I found it strange and when I went to have a look, I found her leaving my house with my brother-in-law."

Her husband was very sad with the departure of his mother. He lost his appetite and could not sleep well. Sometimes he would just sit quietly in a corner. Realizing that it was her fault, Lee Kien requested her husband to take her to Penang where she apologized to his mother.

Invite Master Cheng Yen home

In August 2008, Lee Kien and Soon Hock got to know Tzu Chi through a blood donation campaign. After learning more about Master Cheng Yen and Tzu Chi, Soon Hock decided to install Da Ai TV at his home.

He hoped that his wife and mother would learn to live with each other in harmony through Da Ai TV's programmes.

It worked. After watching a Da Ai drama together, both his mother and wife changed their attitude towards each other, and their relationship also improved.

Lee Kien became actively involved in Tzu Chi's Great Love Mother Class and volunteer training courses; and also learnt Buddhist Dharma in Master Cheng Yen's teachings.

"I always thought that I was unfortunate and pitiful, but I never reflected on my own behaviour. After listening to the other volunteers' sharing, I was ashamed and realised that my problems were so minor."

The Jing-Si Aphorism: "One who constantly looks down on others reveals his lack of moral cultivation" had awakened Lee Kien to make a vow to change her behaviour. When her mother-in-law had an operation and was hospitalized, she wholeheartedly cared for her.

With a heart of repentance, Lee Kien had finally eliminated all the grudges she had with her mother-in-law!

Be a sensible woman

A happy Hock Soon said, "My mother had no formal education, but she loves to watch Da Ai TV programmes, such as, Life's Wisdom by Dharma Master Cheng Yen and Da Ai dramas. She is very grateful to Master Cheng Yen and fully supports the Master's mission of purifying human minds and charity."

Lee Kien said, "I am grateful to my mother-in-law for giving me such a good husband and for being so forgiving. I am also grateful to my husband for being so accommodating."

Last year, Hock Soon and Lee Kien fulfilled their mother's wish to see Master Cheng Yen. She also encouraged them to work hard in Tzu Chi.

Da Ai illuminates my home

Lee Kien had shared her shameful experience on many occasions in Tzu Chi.

She said, "I used to think that it was so shameful to talk about our own family matters in front of the public! But Sister Ci Yu advised me otherwise and gave me the encouragement. She said open repentance helps to rid our mind of afflictions and bad karma." And it is true, because Lee Kien became calmer each time after her sharing.

"I owe Da Ai TV and Master Cheng Yen's Jing-Si Aphorisms for our family's harmony. Da Ai TV has illuminated my home!"

 

The happy family watching Da Ai TV together.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】   The happy family having their dinner together.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】

The happy family watching Da Ai TV together.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】
 
The happy family having their dinner together.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】
 
Siow Lee Kien and Tan Soon Hock are now diligent volunteers of Tzu Chi.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】   A happy mother-in-law helping her daughter-in-law in the kitchen.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】

Siow Lee Kien and Tan Soon Hock are now diligent volunteers of Tzu Chi.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】
 
 
A happy mother-in-law helping her daughter-in-law in the kitchen.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】
 
Lee Kien's mother-in-law encouraged her son and daughter-in-law to work hard in Tzu Chi.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】    

Lee Kien's mother-in-law encouraged her son and daughter-in-law to work hard in Tzu Chi.【Photograph by Ho Wen Yee】
 
   

 

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